Anton Vs The Decibel Tolls

It really was accident, or at least it wasn’t my intent to provoke a fight, but I guess that’s what happens when you poke a sleeping dragon in the eye.  I did not mean to get in an online nerd fight with Anton Newcombe.  I love the Brian Jonestown Massacre.  I can prove it, just look at my Last.fm, they get mad play… just like me, HEY-OH!

Anyway, here’s the story of the infamous pissing contest between myself and Anton Newcombe by way of the Brian Jonestown Massacre’s MySpazzz that I’ve been promising for quite some time.  It’s a good one.

I realize that I have just forfeit my ability to ever interview Anton by publishing this, but this story is just too good to keep in limbo.  A caveat: I do feel kinda bad that I claimed he wasn’t doing anything before I was aware that My Bloody Underground was already in the works.  However, it was never my intent to be mean, I just felt that there was a correlation between the advent of MySpace/YouTube/et al. and the sudden dropoff of BJM’s output.  I still think that’s fair. Here’s the original write-up I did describing the conversation which happened almost one year ago today…

So, as some of you are aware, I’ve been a big fan of the Brian Jonestown Massacre going on, oh, five years or so. Since around the release of This is Our Music. Of course, the documentary Dig has augmented the BJM’s legend and name recognition. In addition, if you’ve seen Dig, then you understand that the brainchild of the band, Anton Newcombe, despite being impressively prolific, is utterly batshit crazy.

Anton is MySpace friends with Lana, as she is also a fan of the band’s music. Since Lana is a cute young lady and Anton is 20 years her senior, he enjoys sending her messages from time to time and comments on pictures of her in a not-necessarily-appropriate manner. I think this is hilarious. However, on a daily basis, Anton posts two to four bulletins waxing nonsensical political musings betwixt random YouTube videos that have some half-conceived and hair-brained correlation. Be it as it may.

A few days ago, I decide that, still being a BJM fan, I’m tired of not having any new material to enjoy since Anton’s too infatuated with the same interests as tweens and pedos. I write him a message from Lana’s name (with idiosyncratic netspeak in tow), figuring that he would respond better to a cute girl than a scruffy dudeface…

anton,

look… you’re very musically talented && i love the bjm so much… so why don’t you fucking get the hell off myspace for ONCE && follow up the WE ARE THE RADIO ep, which was supposed to be the teaser for a new full length that we haven’t even been close to seeing because you’re on goddamned myspace and youtube all day!!!

LL

And Anton replies, much in the vein of the father in A Christmas Story whose vitriolic torrents of pseudo-vulgarities borders on the surreal…

why don’t you blow me fake bitch.
fucking stupid cunt look on youtube cia whore.
i don’t need turd pirate.

for nothin.
fuck you and led zeplin.

delete

http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=antonfjordson

Better yet, he writes this on his blog with the subject “mail bag : satan 19 year old fuck jar writes(used).” So now Lana’s getting mail from both foes of Anton’s insolence and sycophantic Anton apologists. Some wrote messages like “good one!” whilst others felt that we needed to leave poor homeboy alone. One blog comment read: “you are always online, like a freakin tweaker, however, the girl is tryin to give you a compliment so dont be such a dickhead anton. send ted my regards.” His response was classic: “fuck you too. be productive. delete.” Obviously, as a polemist of sorts, this aggression will not stand, man.

I, also, don’t need turd pirate.

hey now, no need to be mean and spell led zeppelin incorrectly.

all i’m saying is that i’d like to see a new album. NOT an online release or another shortcut, a NEW JAM with artwork, a physical record, and some of the best songwriting around today. i just feel that myspace and youtube are hindering this, considering that you wrote and recorded, what, THREE albums in 1996 && now it’s been at least THAT many years since we’ve seen new shit. we had the best of retrospective in’ 04 (no new jams), and then only four songs in ‘05 with the”mini-album.” that’s bullshit, anton. i made a visual aid to demonstrate this point.

let’s get the ball rolling, anton. if not, i may have to bump the warhols up a bit on my playlist

see? do not want.

stop being a fucktard.

also, thanks to my admirers from my original post. your support is appreciated.

Never heard back from him again, but word on the street is that he still acts like a horse’s ass.  But I will always buy his records.  The Brian Jonestown Massacre is still one of the best around today.  I just wish Anton was less tool-ish.

As-Salamu Alaykum, biatchez.